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Need to get out of something? We'll write your excuse. “Tall blonde gym”
My car broke down on the way and I had to wait for roadside assistance to show up.
Plan B: I got abducted by aliens but they returned me three hours later because I kept asking them workout tips.
Delivery tip: Say it matter-of-factly with zero irony—that's what makes it land.
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What's Your Stupidity Archetype?Finally, a quiz that scientifically explains why you're like this. Tell us what you're trying to get out of and we'll write you a believable excuse — plus a gloriously absurd Plan B and a tip on how to deliver it with a straight face. Free, instant, no signup. Fresh resultsFAQ
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